2013 Fall TV Preview: Sunday

I'm a little ashamed of how excited I was to finally see the Entertainment Weekly Fall TV Preview issue in my mailbox yesterday. Issues like these are why I still subscribe, despite the magazine's recent shift towards fetishistic worship of young adult properties and society gossip. I'm always anxious to dive into the preview issue and plan my seasonal television schedule, even if that schedule inevitably falls apart two weeks in. As with the new movie preview rule, though, I'm not going to put in the effort to type out everything that's airing on every day anymore. Let's face it, I'm not going to be watching the new season of Family Guy, and researching its timeslot and premiere date is a waste of everyone's time.

There's still plenty to talk about, though. And planning what to watch is going to take work! Most TV obsessives have extensive cable packages and a DVR; I've got neither. So, how to handle the onslaught of new and returning shows soon to bathe us in their warming glow? Let's dive into Sunday's offerings! All times given are Central.

NEW SHOWS

Betrayal (September 29, ABC, 9PM): I like the showrunner's promise that the first (and any subsequent) season will be limited to 13 episodes. I'm less excited about its trite title and what sounds like a well-worn premise - A photographer and a high-powered lawyer have an affair, which is complicated by a murder and legal battle that embroils both of their families. If I've got nothing to do that Sunday, I may check out the premiere episode, but this may be a show that I catch up on later or skip altogether.

Masters of Sex (September 29, Showtime, 9PM): A period drama about Masters and Johnson. I'm not really sure how their studies can sustain an ongoing show, but since this was probably made as a pretext to draw viewers in with nudity, who cares? I like Lizzy Caplan, but she's no guarantee of quality, and since I don't get Showtime anyway, it's immaterial.

Hello Ladies (September 29, HBO, 9:30PM): Stephen Merchant's new comedy, in which he plays a hapless Web designer in Los Angeles who can't get laid. As with Masters of Sex, I don't get the channel it's airing on, so I'll have to catch up with it later if turns out to be any good.

RETURNING SHOWS

Bob's Burgers (September 29, FOX, 7:30PM): Season 3 was one of the highlights of my TV year, and the new season will be one of the few shows that I'll make appointment viewing. I worry that I'm building my expectations up too high, given how effusive I was about the last season, but I'm reasonably certain that this show still has plenty of creative ideas to mine.

Once Upon a Time (September 29, ABC, 7PM): I've never been so mesmerized by a show that I clearly recognize is not particularly good. Netflix recently added Season 2, and I'm breezing my way through, completely hypnotized. Its special effects are laughable, it includes the worst child actor working today, and it can't make a point without hamfistedly reiterating it a million times. And yet I can't stop watching. Season 3 is premiering soon, and if it didn't conflict with Bob's Burgers, I'd probably be sitting slack-jawed in front of it, wondering why I continue to subject myself to it. As it is, I'll likely catch up with it later, and deny it to anyone who asks.

The Amazing Race (September 29, CBS, 7PM): I'm only bringing this one up because it used to be one of my favorite shows. Every show runs out of steam after a while, and The Amazing Race stopped being compelling a long time ago. Still, as a nod to the excitement it used to stir in me, I thought I'd mention that its 23rd season is starting up. I don't know a single person who still watches it, but for the hardcore fans that remain, have at it.

THE WORLD OF TOMORROW

This section is to quickly mention the returning shows that I've never seen, but that are on my radar to catch up with someday, if I ever get the opportunity:

Revenge: Season 3, September 29, ABC, 8PM

The Good Wife: Season 5, September 29, CBS, 8PM

Homeland: Season 3, September 29, Showtime, 8PM